Things in Erin’s Head 


Today was estate planning day. Updates to important documents with our attorney, which involved important conversations. Conversations about mortality. I was proud of myself because instead of pretending I’m not… ME… I blocked off the remainder of the day to pause. To rest my mind and my heart. 

I snuggled into #NotMyCat’s bed (again, let us not pretend it’s MY bed, we know whose bed it is for 16 hours out of the day). I curled onto my side and squished my almost-too-flat pillow under my head and pressed ‘play’ on the 2015 movie, “The Age of Adaline,” starring Blake Lively (who I adore). Adaline is a woman who miraculously never ages, and as a result must live a life unattached to anyone, out of fear they will learn her secret. During a moment of near connection, where Adaline emotionally withdraws from her suitor, the movie weaves in an English translation of the Anthony Capella quote, “Anni, amori e bicchieri di vino, nun se contano mai.” 

Years, lovers and glasses of wine; these things must not be counted.

Ah, the Italians! The lighthearted quote gave me pause after such a weighty morning. I wondered quickly if I was living a life too rigid, and I did a quick scan of the list:

1) Years. Got ’em. Not hiding from them (I spent the last two newsletters talking about my birthday and at Truluck’s I TOLD them it was my birthday, which Jerry found weird, but I wanted confetti on the table…).

2) Lovers. I’ve got my man. (and that’s all I’m saying…) 

3) Glasses of wine. This was the one. Perhaps I can allow myself to indulge in a little, teeny, weeny bit more vino (I do love a good red). Maybe I’ll buy myself some of those little Italian wine glasses – the casual little stemless tumblers. After all, in the Blue Zone of Sardinia, the centenarians consume up to four, three ounce glasses of wine every day… (do I need to enter a disclosure here about not condoning alcoholism / over-indulgence / don’t drink and drive / be responsible?).

I’m leaving you with this, dear reader. 

My PSA: Consider getting your affairs in order. Yes, they are crappy conversations. Yes, it will make it much easier on your survivors if you do. There are good, kind, patient estate planners out there who can help you. Allow yourself to feel all the feels about this whole process. If you let yourself feel it, the sooner it will pass. 

And love. Love for the years you get to share with your most favorite people. Love for the lovers you get to share tender whispers and caresses with. Love for the vino.

Because it’s all about love…

If you aren’t already a member, I invite you to join my Taking the Pause group in Facebook
where I’ll be talking more about embracing ease and the tools of the Empowered Caregiver.