Things in Erin’s Head 

 

Fun Fact: The name of my evil twin is Karen. She was officially named around the turn of the millennium, way, way, WAY before social media and before #Karen became a thing (I was a tad butt-hurt about that because “Karen” was MY thing and I had to start sharing it with the world). It came about because people, on occasion, would incorrectly call me Karen instead of Erin and it would get me in a huge kerfuffle. There’s nothing wrong with the name Karen (except it’s NOT my name), and I responded to the human error like a cat whose fur had been rubbed the wrong way. Back in my property manager days it was really a crap shoot which version of me you’d get. One day a coworker called me and gingerly asked, “Who do I have today? Erin or Karen?” and my evil twin was from that point on forever known as Karen. Karen is nasty, ornery, and rather spiteful. She is my least favorite version of myself. She is NOT gruntled (which I just learned this week is a real word) at all. She is the epitome of disgruntled, and she lets it be known.

Dormant for many years now, Karen chose to rear her head this past week. While her appearances were brief, I didn’t particularly like seeing her and I wondered what the misalignment was in me that gave her the invitation to show up.

(Pause to celebrate Jerry in this MOMENT because he just appeared with a lunch snack to keep me satiated while I work. Damn I love him… xoxo) 

I sat in meditation yesterday morning and sifted through life’s normal annoyances (the messy house, the grocery shopping that needs to be done, the vendors who haven’t been showing up…), and what started to bubble up was the work I’m doing for Caregivers. Not the work itself per se, but how I’m talking about it. 

I realized, I feel like I’m focusing on the wrong thing. I’m talking about the trauma (which is real). I’m talking about the burnout (which is so, so real). I’m talking about ways you can dance around those things, and soften those things. But my personal experience is – you can’t completely AVOID these things. And focusing on those things feels HEAVY. (Which was very much how I felt as a property manager. #Karen)

What I hear from Caregivers the most is that A) They are overwhelmed and exhausted; B) They have no time for self-care (and feel selfish for taking it even if they have time); C) Their intimate, inner circle of friends feels smaller because people don’t get what they are going through; D) They are afraid (which equates to feeling unsafe). What Caregivers search for is an escape. Something that transports them – even just for a few moments – to a place where they aren’t responsible for keeping another person alive. And that part of my message was hiding (from all of us!). 

Because wouldn’t it be lovely to just be able to show up as you – whatever version of you is showing up that day – and be able to escape in a healthy way? With meditations, art, tapping, conversation, and movement? Wouldn’t it feel refreshing to have a place to go that wasn’t on social media? Where people GOT you – but weren’t focused on the thing that’s weighing you down? A place for love and connection and a bit of downright silliness? Delivered in small, fun-size pieces, that are easily accessible and digestible? 

The moment I made the shift in my own mind I felt so much LIGHTER. I’m curious if you can feel it too? Just from this email??

As scheduled, I’m continuing the conversation about the pillars of The Caregiver’s Carabiner and tonight, May 8, 2024 at 7:00pm we’re talking about FEELINGS. I’m excited to see where the conversation leads with this new lighter energy surrounding us. Want to join us << Test First Name >> (or catch the replay)? Just reply to this email and I’ll send you the Zoom link 30 minutes before we start (if you’ve previously registered, you’re all set – AND you get the replay!). 

Because it’s all about love…

Join as a Founding Member today: 

THE CAREGIVER’S CARABINER

A membership created to soften the Caregiving journey with tools, resources, and gentle guidance that support both a Caregiver’s active journey and their recovery, in an honest and playful way.

Beginning May 22, 2024